We apologize for the lapse in communication…we were very busy preparing for another Hate Week.
We have sent all the copies of 1984 in our possession, leaving 166 Inner Party Members yet to be indoctrinated.
Following are the House Inner Party Members who have not yet received copies.
The Senate Inner Party Members have been re-educated fullwise by now.
Pick a rep. to sponsor today!
And now, for today’s Two Minutes Hate.
In our Internet travels, we found this little gem on Rep. Eric Cantor’s homepage:
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
CONTACT: Rachel Bauer
March 7, 2007
Cantor Reacts to Democrat Plan to Import Terrorists to America
WASHINGTON, DC -In response to the Democrat plan to shut down the detention camp at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, and relocate terrorists to military prisons in Quantico, VA., and Charleston, S.C., Congressman Eric Cantor released the following statement:
“I have no idea why Democrats lead by Speaker Pelosi and Jack Murtha would want to import known terrorist organizers into America. Virginians neither want nor need hundreds of terrorists with connections to 9/11 groups like Al Qaeda in our Commonwealth.
This shocking lack of judgment demonstrates that liberal Democrats do not understand that these terrorists want to kill Americans and destroy our way of life. These dangerous, terrible people should not be allowed into our country.
Don’t forget to watch our YouTube video from last month. A new video is in the works.
And as always, please send your books to:
Guilford, CT 06437
In honor of President’s Day, we have been preparing another shipment of The Book.
This time, we will ship 1984 to every Inner Party Member of the Senator who voted for the MCA and did not lose his/her job in the Great November Purge.
This will conclude Miniluv’s re-education of the Senate, thereby leaving approximately 200 Inner Party Members of the House remaining to be re-educated. Our book reserves will be depleted fullwise…therefore we need your copies of 1984 right away! About two hundred copies will complete our mission.
Meanwhile, did you know about the Warner Act?
Go behind the scenes with actual agents from the Ministry of Love as they prepare a book mailing!
We have received a promise of 30 new books from Comrade Longsine of Montana, coincidentally the home state of a certain senator whose name escapes our memory at the moment.
We thank Comrade Longsine, and his co-conspirators: Comrades Evans, Ham, Klinger,
Miller, Naples, Parks, Puttkammer, and Setzer. We are also grateful to Shakespeare & Company who will be supplying the books.
Once received, this donation will bring our collection total to 116, or 37% of our goal!
A glorious victory: the Ministry of Love has recently shipped copies of the book to several dozen unpersons.
Video of this historic event will be posted shortly.
Today, we are indebted to Comrade Paglino of Ohio and Comrade Loftis of New York, who have brought our collection total to 86 books. This represents 27% of our goal!
Meanwhile, we are still accepting copies of 1984 at:
PO Box 655
Guilford, CT 06437
In other news, we wish to share with you photographs of actual members of the Ministry of Love, who recently emerged from their underground headquarters to mourn the passing of the United States Constitution.
Here you see the gravesite where the Constitution was laid to its eternal rest.
Mourners gather to pay their respects to the document. This small child was especially upset.
Finally, Comrade Cobb reads the eulogy.
Our brave comrades have thwarted the underground resistance to send the Ministry of Love a total of 57 copies of 1984. This is a glorious victory for Miniluv!
While we are still gathering books to reach our final goal of 315, we have become aware that many of the Inner Party Members who voted for torture did not survive the Great November Purge, and are soon to be vaporized. Therefore, we will be sending copies to these unpersons sooner than expected.
We are currently consulting with the Ministry of Truth to prepare a “total information awareness” campaign to promote this mailing. Any help that our comrades can provide is greatly appreciated.
Comrades at Unamerican and Students for an Orwellian Society have agreed to sign on as co-sponsors to this project. Details to follow.
We have reached 10% of our goal number. Books are coming in from brave comrades all across our homeland.
The following Inner Party Members are spoken for:
Bachus of Alabama
Calvert of California
Lieberman, Johnson, Simmons, and Shays of Connecticut
Brownback of Kansas
Gregg and Sununu of New Hampshire
Brown, Voinovich and DeWine of Ohio
Fitzpatrick, Specter and Santorum of Pennsylvania
J. Davis, T. Davis, Warner, and Allen of Virginia
To sponsor your own Member with a book donation, enclose a note with your shipment.
Keep spreading the word.
The Ministry of Love announces its fourth-quarter plan to gather 315 separate copies of George Orwell’s landmark novel 1984, from proles and party comrades alike, all across our brave homeland.
Once collected, all 315 copies will be mailed separately to each Member of Congress who voted YEA on the Military Commissions Act (a.k.a. The Torture Bill) on September 28th and 29th, in the sixth year of our glorious leader’s regime. These shipments will occur with great fanfare, and hopefully, a television news crew on hand to capture the momentous occasion for inclusion in the Ministry of Truth’s ever-growing archives.
In case you’ve forgotten, our glorious leader’s regime has gifted us with the following remarkably Orwellian achievements:
* spying on ordinary citizens without their knowledge
* paid propaganda masquerading as news reports
* removal by Thought Police of ungoodthinkers (protesters) from all Party rallies and celebrations featuring our glorious leader
* community members encouraged to report “suspicious activities” of neighbors and co-workers
* the promise of an endless war
(for a more comprehensive list, go to studentsfororwell.org)
Now, through the farsightedness of these distinguished 315 Inner Party Members, House and Senate, we can add sanctioned torture and indefinite detainment of suspects to that noteworthy list.
To recognize those who have brought us one step closer to the utopian world envisioned by Orwell, Miniluv will enclose a handwritten note with each copy of 1984, thanking each 315 Inner Party Member individually for their achievement.
Send new and used copies of 1984 to the following address:
Ministry of Love
Guilford, CT 06437
If buying books online, have them shipped directly to Miniluv.
If you would like your donation earmarked for a particular Inner Party Member, please note that with your shipment.
Goodthinkers always use media mail rates for shipping books.
Cash donations for postage to the Inner Party Members are doubleplushelpful.
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH